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Opening the Heart and Exploring Beneath the Surface
Exploring beneath the surface of a reoccurring relationship issuecan be tedious and scary. Seeing beyond a nagging health challenge tothe 'deeper issue' requires courage, faith and trust. Unwanted feelings and thoughts are rich territory to dive beneaththe surface for fresh insights that open the heart. When we take the timeto peel away the layers that have us stuck or paralyzed we reap thebenefits of self-acceptance, compassion, and liberation from fear. Let's look at what may be underneath a chronic response of anger.Chronic reactive angry responses can disrupt relationships,derail important business deals, and cause high blood pressure. Imagine for a moment that you are floating along on the ocean of feelingsunwilling to accept that the choppy waves to your left signifyanger. If you put on snorkeling gear and dive under them, youwill see a whole new world. Beneath the anger you will most likely find a hurt or a fear.Complete the following sentences with yourself: **Each time I think of __________I get angry. **If I feel this anger, I'm afraid that ___________. **When I feel this anger, I am hurt about __________. Remember, avoid assigning personal meaning to these feelings.(I'm such a terrible person for feeling and thinking this way.) Just swim around with your snorkel securely in place,investigating the fear or hurt that lie beneath the anger. Surface briefly and reflect about the role your anger plays. Hereare a few possibilities: **Anger is a shield that protects a part of me that feels afraidor hurt. **Anger is a red flag alerting me to the presence of fear orhurt. **Anger is a messenger. A part inside must feel afraid or hurt. Now take a deep breath and dive again, looking next to the fearor hurt for a judgment it may have spawned, such as thefollowing: **If people knew I was afraid they would reject me. **I'm pathetic for being afraid of this. **Feeling hurt is weak and foolish. **Because I feel hurt I am unworthy of love. To further complicate opening our heart the mind adoptsblack and white thinking. Desperately needingto stay in control of life and make sense of the world, weresort to rejecting what we see as wrong (bad, inappropriate,immoral) and cling to what we see as right (good, appropriate,moral). When the heart opens, making sense of the world is not asimportant as being happy, finding lasting peace, feeling healthyand stress free, and getting a good night's sleep. Restrainingfrom taking a position about the world, other's behavior, ourperformance at work allows the heart to thaw out revealing depthsof information that quiets fear and loosens the grip of control.We then can live authentically rather than self-righteously. Questions for Letting Go of Black/White Thinking: 1.If I am judging my husband/wife/boss/ friend do I also judgemyself in the same way? 2.Am I condemning my mistakes or lack of perfection because I amafraid of failing or being seen as a failure? 3.Do I judge anger (fear, sadness, caring, loving) as wrong inothers because I see it as wrong in myself? 4.Do certain people get on my nerves because I'm afraid theirbehavior resembles my own? 5.If I want to be happy rather than right in this situation, whatdo I need to accept and forgive in myself? Snorkeling can open the mind to what is really going on in ourocean of feelings. But only self-acceptance can uncover thesetruths and open the heart. Then inner fears can be comfortedand judgments forgiven. Compassion replaces blame and shame,and we discover a place of peace and well-being beyond thechoppy surface waters. Next time there isa challenge we can don our snorkeling gear with theexperience of knowing that what lies underneath ouranxiety is a safe refuge - our open, loving heart. ************************************** Rebecca Skeele, author of You Can Make It Heaven:How to Enrich Your Life with Abundance and Loving is an ordained minister. She has a MA in Spiritual Counseling and MSS in Spiritual Science. She has a private practice in Santa Fe as a life coach and counselor.Rebecca is an international workshop leader and speaker inspiring people to become masterful at cocreating theirpersonal heaven on earth.http://www.makeitheaven.com
Latest News:Site: Yahoo! News Search Results for news News Corp exec becomes chief of Germany's Premiere (Reuters via Yahoo! News) News Corp's chief financial officer for Europe and Asia has been named chief executive of German pay television group Premiere, following the resignation of Michael Boernicke, Premiere said on Wednesday. News Corporation to redevelop London Wapping site (Reuters via Yahoo! News) Rupert Murdoch's News Corporation is to redevelop its Wapping site in London, moving all its UK businesses, including News International, Harper Collins, MySpace and Dow Jones, under one roof. UPI NewsTrack Entertainment News (UPI) Chesney nominated for 7 CMAs ... Hoffman: I'm not playing Penguin ... 'RocknRolla' No. 1 at U.K. box office ... Jessica Simpson stops song on 'GMA' ... News from United Press International. DailyMe: News tailored to your individual tastes (The Christian Science Monitor) Column: Custom news websites come and go, but this one gets it right. Sarah Palin docu wins record ratings for Fox News (Reuters via Yahoo! News) In a week of records surrounding the Republican National Convention, Fox News Channel earned another one with its weekend documentary on vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. MySpace ad business ahead of target: News Corp (Reuters via Yahoo! News) News Corp's (NWSa.N) MySpace advertising business is operating ahead of expectations and its digital ad business is performing better than the marketplace, the company's chief operating officer said on Tuesday. STOCKS NEWS EUROPE-Erdemir shares fall on iron ore prices (Reuters via Yahoo! Malaysia News) STOCKS NEWS Reuters Results diary News Buzz: Recreating the Big Bang, Gates Urges Slow Iraq Drawdown, Ike Gains Strength (US News & World Report) Top news from the Associated Press For consumers, good news down the line (Sun-Sentinel) Whether you buy a new iPod or not, there may be good news for you in Apple's release of new iPods on Tuesday . Fox News Vaults To Top Of Primetime Ratings (MultiChannel News) Who says no one watches political conventions? Fox News Channel?s coverage of GOP Presidential nominee John McCain?s Sept. 4 acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention drew 9.2 million viewers, topping all other basic cable shows last week, according to Nielsen Media Research data. Site: news - Google News News Analysis A Difficult Road Awaits Panetta at the CIA - New York Times
MORE RESOURCES: Site: Yahoo! News Search Results for inspirational Inspirational Experts in Fashion, Cuisine and Lifestyle to Share Tips and Trends at Orange County Head to Toe Women's ... (PRWeb) Southern California's premiere women's consumer show, the Head to Toe Women's Expo returns to OC Fair and Event Center in Costa Mesa, Calif., October 10, 11 and 12, 2008. Presented by Ralphs Grocery, the Head to Toe Women's Expo gives mothers, daughters, and girlfriends a chance to reconnect during a weekend of shopping, pampering, makeovers and inspirational speakers. Several experts, ... http://firepit-plans.com Introduces "The Fire Pit Planner Guide" a Comprehensive Inspirational Guide to Building ... (PRWeb via Yahoo! News) http://firepit-plans.com is a new site that offers a unique do-it-yourself inspirational plan to building fire pits, the guide offers tips and advice on operating and constructing fire pits in the outdoors, house garden or backyard. Reporter's Notebook (Dallas Morning News) Certain parts of Irving City Hall will soon be getting makeovers. Residents and visitors can expect to see inspirational quotes on walls and prominent displays of the city?s mission statement within a couple of months. Bob Walter: Iraq hero gets moving tribute in Elk Grove Park (The Sacramento Bee) For a hero: As if anybody could forget Joe Nurre of Wilton, a fitting and permanent memorial to the inspirational Elk Grove High School football captain is attracting plenty of attention in Elk Grove Park. Joe Nurre A plaque dedicates an Elk Grove barbecue area to Joe Nurre. MCC Honors 9/11 Victims and Families (R News) Monroe Community College hosted a special 9/11 commemorative ceremony at the Remembrance Walk on the Brighton campus. The hour long event included music, inspirational speeches, a moment of silence and flowers placed at the base of the 9/11 monument there. Local review: 'Bill W. and Dr. Bob' entertaining, educational (The Pantagraph) For a gripping evening of theater as educational as it is inspirational, ?Bill W. and Dr. Bob? at Heartland Theatre Company, can?t be beat. Steve Amerson to Sing at the Congressional Medal of Honor Society's Convention (Christian News Wire) DENVER, Sept. 11 / Christian Newswire / -- Steve Amerson, well-known Inspirational music artist will be singing at the Congressional Medal of Honor Society's Annual Convention, A Celebration of Honor, in Denver, Colorado at the "Patriots Award Gala" on Friday, September 19, 2008. Radio pirate suspect arrested in Wilton Manors apartment (Sun-Sentinel) When you tune into FM 103.9 in Broward County , you're supposed to hear a sermon by Calvary Chapel Fort Lauderdale Pastor Bob Coy or inspirational music from the likes of Mercy Me and Steven Curtis Chapman. Randolph Reads kicks off with celebration (Asheboro Courier-Tribune) ASHEBORO ? A Randolph County initiative to unite the community in reading and discussing an inspirational non-fiction book about a nearby town?s struggles with change is under way. Honor Text Helps Americans to Remember (WCAV Charlottesville) The clock strikes 9:11am and your phone beeps, but it?s not your average text message. Instead, it?s an Honor Text, a brief inspirational message about some of America?s service men and women. Site: inspirational - Google News » Inspirational drama anything but 'Broken' - Chicago Daily Herald
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