|
|
| Information |
|
|
The Army Corp of Engineers Having Issues Fixing Breach
The Army Corp of engineers is having a tough time filling in the breaches in the levees. They have tried to use giant sand bags to drop into the hole. Three-Thousand pound bags have been dropped into the breach but to no avail. Lake Pontchartrain has a lot of weight behind it and fixing the breach and pumping out the water could take months. I therefore have an idea. Now before you say my idea is crazy, remember the President to think on this and that no idea is too far out, we need to put on our thinking caps. Good, I have an idea. Most of the lawyers in New Orleans and the Gulf Coast have lost their offices in Hurricane Katrina. They can no longer practice law, since no courts are open for them to file lawsuits and lawyers will just hamper rebuilding efforts anyway. I therefore propose that we use Lawyers to fill the New Orleans broken Levees. We help expire as many lawyers as it takes to fill up the breach-gap left by the Hurricane with dead lawyers. Unfortunately they are so full of shit they do not sink very well. Normally human feces floats and a perfect example of that density proof in physics is the stuff already floating in the New Orleans Soup Bowl. I propose to harden them in a fast heavy plaster mixture with sand bags attached to the abdomen, because it you leave the rope attached which you used to coax them into their civic duty, then eventually the head will depart once submerged for several weeks and we do not want a re-breach if their bodies float away. So we need to leave them secured with straps. Finally a way for the lawyers to pay back society and do some good in the world; Think on this, as there has to be a way to make this happen. "Lance Winslow" - If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; http://www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs
Latest News:Site: Yahoo! News Search Results for news Sarah Palin docu wins record ratings for Fox News (Reuters via Yahoo! News) In a week of records surrounding the Republican National Convention, Fox News Channel earned another one with its weekend documentary on vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. MySpace ad business ahead of target: News Corp (Reuters via Yahoo! News) News Corp's (NWSa.N) MySpace advertising business is operating ahead of expectations and its digital ad business is performing better than the marketplace, the company's chief operating officer said on Tuesday. Relief: Cubs get good news on Zambrano, Harden (ESPN) The Cubs received encouraging news on pitchers Rich Harden and Carlos Zambrano on Tuesday. False bankruptcy item highlights risks in online news (Market Watch) Investors are getting a fresh lesson in the power and perils of lightning-fast news on the Web in an already fast-moving market. Petraeus to Brief FOX News on Final Battlefield Tour (Fox News) Gen David Petraeus, fresh off an announcement that thousands of U.S. troops will be withdrawn from Iraq, will give his final U.S. interview to FOX News Wednesday before handing over control of U.S.-led forces in Iraq to Gen. Raymond Odierno next week. Lesson 6: Broadcasting news (BBC News) Students practise reading the news and produce a news programme adhering to a strict deadline. UPI NewsTrack Quirks in the News (UPI) Car crash knocks woman off toilet ? Woman uses Feng Shui after car hits home ? Mistakenly diagosed man gives away savings ? Wisconsin man eats 23,000 Big Macs ? UPI Quirks in the News. Lesson 5: Ordering news (BBC News) Students order several reports to make a news programme which appeals to a specific audience. Lesson 3: Writing News (BBC News) Students write a news script which is clear, concise and correct - the three Cs of journalism. Yahoo News Redesign May Pull a Technorati ? Why Not Twitter? (Wired News) Bloggers have uncovered URLs for a new Yahoo News layout which includes a ?Most Blogged? section. The list is presumably based off Buzz Tracker, which displays related blog posts and those that link back to an article. But wouldn't a "Twittered About" section make the site seem more cutting-edge? Site: news - Google News CNET News Daily Podcast: Say hello to the Palm Pre - CNET News
MORE RESOURCES: Site: Yahoo! News Search Results for humor New play finds humor in horror (Brigham Young NewsNet) 'Bread of Affliction,' a new production by the BYU Experimental Theatre Company, which will run Sept. 12 and 13, demonstrates how the Jewish people have survived many things largely through the power of humor. 'Whole lotta kid' kept humor despite cancer (Miami Herald) From the minute he was born, on Nov. 22, 1995, at 8.2 pounds, Bailey Blu Kayes was ``a whole lotta kid.'' He was, said his mother, Nicole Bailey, ``all energy -- running full speed, nonstop.'' TenantReports.com Injects a Sense of Humor into the Housing Market Amidst Credit Crisis (PRWeb) The mortgage meltdown makes tenant screening more important than ever for independent real estate investors. Real estate services site, www.TenantReports.com , aims to educate landlords on effectively screening potential tenants, while bringing a smile to those wrought with anxiety or fear of foreclosure at the thought of taking on tenants who can't pay the rent. (PRWeb Sep 11, 2008) Read ... Try humor to discourage kids' drama (The Charlotte Observer) Q. Our 16-year-old daughter constantly tells her younger siblings what to do and how to do it, and that the way they do things isn't good enough. It creates daily friction. What can we do to make it stop? A sense of humor would help. Fifty-plus years ago parents took child-raising seriously, but they took children, for the most part, with the proverbial grain of salt. Today's parents take ... Glossy thriller "Fringe" has heart, humor (Reuters via Yahoo! News) Strange things are happening, which is what you'd expect in a new series from J.J. Abrams. York County calendar of events (York County Coast Star) Talk: "The Art of Maine Humor" by Tim Sample at the Ogunquit Museum of American Art, at 6:30 p.m. 646-5511 / www.ogunquitplayhouse.org. Golden anniversary for Davidsons (Georgetown Record) What keeps a marriage strong and healthy for 50 years? The grown children of Georgetown residents Bob and Betty Davidson think it is their love of strong family values plus a shared sense of humor and acceptance of each other. ?Spiderwick Chronicles? comes to Fenton library (Tri-County Times) Fenton ? What do you get when you cross ice cream with a VCR? The answer? A ?time-out.? ?Hob the troll? from the Renaissance Festival, with his own special humor, music and stories, was the highlight of a ?Spiderwick Chronicles? event at Jack R. Winegarden Library in Fenton. Varner: College education puts wage earners ahead of curve (The Pantagraph) A grandfather in the area sent an e-mail commenting on a recent article and also remembered my youthful enthusiasm, humor and respect for students. He couldn?t however quite remember when he was in my class. A quick check in the grade book showed it was fall 1975. I was brand new at Illinois State University. God has a sense of humor (The South Alabamian) Psalm 59 :7-8 (NLT) "Listen to the filth that comes from their mouths; their words cut like swords. 'After all, who can hear us?' they sneer. But LORD, you laugh at them. You scoff at all the hostile nations." Jesus faced the problem of pride with many of his closest disciples. Site: humor - Google News 'Darwin Awards': accidental humor - Baltimore Sun
|
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Not Your Average Sunday Morning Just recently my ex-husband stopped in to visit during his vacation. In the course of small talk, a few old memories usually crop up in the conversation. Starbucks Going into Hilton Well, I hope you did not read that headline wrong, Crew Member Starbucks is not doing Paris Hilton. What I am saying here is Starbucks will now be offered in some Hilton Hotels. Humor Quotations - Top 35 Funny Quotations by Famous Comedians "Education is worth a whole lot. Just think - with enough education and brains the average man would make a good lawyer - and so would the average lawyer. Cant Get There From Here Can't Get There From Here Juneau is the capital of Alaska, but did you know that you cannot drive there from anywhere? You can fly into Juneau or you can take a ferry to Juneau, but you can't actually drive there. There are no roads into Juneau. When It Rains, It Pours: Creating a Plan It's time for me to announce that I have a lot of skeletons in my closet. I keep them there to stop people from stealing my jackets. Used Condom Found In Restaurant Salad Bar; Waiter Embarrassed To Tears Evidence of after-hours activity turned up at a Big Boy restaurant salad bar in Detroit last week, embarrassing not only the perpetrators, but nearly everyone associated with the company.Apparently, Mike Finney and Rhonda Carrion were working together to close down the restaurant's soup, salad and dessert bar and, with no one else around, culminated a night of flirting with sexual intercourse right on the bar. Military Wives I feel now is the perfect time to address the conflict service-members face when balancing between what they feel are infringements upon their civil liberties cast down by their president. I have never been one to get involved with inter-service rivalries because I have always felt we must remain, "We band of brothers" and support and defend our own constitutions against all enemies, either foreign wives or domestic. Cheer-Leadership or All I Need to Know About Business I Learned from Cheerleading Thanks to teen movies, many people have this stereotypical idea of cheerleaders as being ditzy and mean. However, there are a great many life-lessons that can be learned during your time on the team that have surprising application in the business world. Space, and the Room for It Space exploration came a long way since I was the size of a measurable amount of it.I remember with some pain, my first ride on a penny farthing with its big wheel and long spokes that were well engineered to cut a foot or two off anyone's legs. Sweet Vengeance Purrfected I love animals but cats are my favorites. There's just something about them that makes me relate to them so easily. Mexican Spaminator When we decided to move to Mexico, one of the most exciting things that popped into my mind was that I would get a new Internet Service Provider and finally get off the 300,000,000 Spam lists that I was on. I thought for sure I would go insane if I received one more "How to Enlarge Your Manhood" piece of Spam-as if I needed to do that anyway (yeah right). The Patience of Job Voltaire said, "God is a comedian playing to an audience afraid to laugh." Translated, if you're a tight ass, there's a two drink minimum to read this article. When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked forward to the spiritual journey that would define who I was as a person. Saving SpongeBob Using High Tech Put Active RFID Satellite Tags in SpongeBobsSpongeBob has been in the news a lot lately, he has been a kidnapped Victim. Instead of wasting time with an Amber Alert for SpongeBob, why not put an Active RFID Satellite Tags in the SpongeBobs so we can track them to the culprits. The Hidden Driveway I won't lie: there are a lot of things I want in life, and some of them I'd even pay for. Rather than listing them in some aimless order so that I can feel bad about not having these things, I will instead focus on one thing that is actually attainable: a hidden driveway. Poor Rixs Almanac 8-13-05 Dear Poor Rix: A guy just invited me to a football game. I do not understand this event. The Restaurant Chronicles, Part 1 Have you ever heard that saying, "The show must go on"? When you hear it, you think of what is commonly referred to as "Show-biz," don't you? But where can you go to see the best acting money can buy, any day of the week? No, I'm not talking about the theatre or TV. I'm talking about the "Restaurant-biz. The Language of Appalachia Imagine my surprise when I went to Jamaica a few years ago and learned that I do, indeed, have an accent. You see, unlike my paternal grandmother, I don't stretch the word "cornbread" into four syllables. [Not So] Outgoing Mail I am currently perplexed by the concept of outgoing mail. I mean, I understand it in theory, but today I tried talking to it and it didn't even respond. Humor Under The Keyboards For me, the piano is the symbol of what is stiff, proper and elegant. It doesn't have faults, it is perfect.
|
| Home | Site Map | Resource Links |
