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Slip-sliding On A Peel
Every day, or at least every other day, we make a fruit smoothie at mid morning. Almost without fail, these smoothies contain bananas; so, we go through about 10 or 12 bananas a week. Depending on my mood or the availability, these smoothies may also contain mango, papaya, pineapple, coconut or whatever other fresh fruit comes our way plus ice, water and the blender. Maybe also yoghurt or wheat germ. However, banana is the usual and requisite smoothie base. One day, after being out of bananas for an unreasonable amount of time (say 2 or 3 days), I journeyed to town for the morning farmer's market. I went to my regular produce lady, Latina. "Morning darling," she greeted me as usual, "How's your woman?" "Almost as sweet and beautiful as you," I reply, earning a kiss and a smile. I picked out the various fruits and veggies that either caught my attention or she told me to buy. ("She'd be buying this if she were here, ya know") "Bananas?" I ask. "Nope. No bananas," she deadpans. "Who has bananas then?" I ask, hoping that she will point me to her favorite competitor. "No bananas anywhere." She is adamant. "None?" I am incredulous, "They are the main crop of this island. How can there be no bananas? There are always bananas." "T'ain't none nowhere now," she affirms. "Are you trying to tell me there are no bananas on an island that survives on its banana exports?" "Yes, we have no bananas," she says with a wicked smile. 'Harry, please save me', I think; 'this cannot be true; a mellow yellow flashback?' 'Come Mr. Tally man, tally me bananas; me tired and me want to go home' he echoes, answering from almost 40 years ago. I go home, sans banana, stunned, dazed and confused. Two days later, a neighbor shows up with 200 bananas. "I hear you want some," he says. A few days later, we are having two smoothies a day and giving away banana bread to all our neighbors; a million fruit flies hover in my kitchen and, in my dreams, there is this recurring vision of Carmen Miranda. I am a cultural refugee, caught in a forgotten Calypso tape loop or a cosmic slapstick joke. © Leslie Fieger. All rights reserved worldwide. Leslie is the author of The DELFIN Knowledge System Trilogy: The Initiation, The Journey and The Quest plus many more success publications. He also the co-author of The End of the World with Hugh Jeffries and Alexandra's DragonFire with his daughter Ashley. Subscribe to his free and ad-free eZine at http://www.ProsperityParadigm.com or http://www.LeslieFieger.com Reprinting and republishing of these articles is granted only with the above credit included. Permission to reprint or republish does not waive any copyright.
Latest News:Site: Yahoo! News Search Results for news Sarah Palin docu wins record ratings for Fox News (Reuters via Yahoo! News) In a week of records surrounding the Republican National Convention, Fox News Channel earned another one with its weekend documentary on vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin. MySpace ad business ahead of target: News Corp (Reuters via Yahoo! News) News Corp's (NWSa.N) MySpace advertising business is operating ahead of expectations and its digital ad business is performing better than the marketplace, the company's chief operating officer said on Tuesday. Relief: Cubs get good news on Zambrano, Harden (ESPN) The Cubs received encouraging news on pitchers Rich Harden and Carlos Zambrano on Tuesday. False bankruptcy item highlights risks in online news (Market Watch) Investors are getting a fresh lesson in the power and perils of lightning-fast news on the Web in an already fast-moving market. Petraeus to Brief FOX News on Final Battlefield Tour (Fox News) Gen David Petraeus, fresh off an announcement that thousands of U.S. troops will be withdrawn from Iraq, will give his final U.S. interview to FOX News Wednesday before handing over control of U.S.-led forces in Iraq to Gen. Raymond Odierno next week. Lesson 6: Broadcasting news (BBC News) Students practise reading the news and produce a news programme adhering to a strict deadline. UPI NewsTrack Quirks in the News (UPI) Car crash knocks woman off toilet ? Woman uses Feng Shui after car hits home ? Mistakenly diagosed man gives away savings ? Wisconsin man eats 23,000 Big Macs ? UPI Quirks in the News. Lesson 5: Ordering news (BBC News) Students order several reports to make a news programme which appeals to a specific audience. Lesson 3: Writing News (BBC News) Students write a news script which is clear, concise and correct - the three Cs of journalism. Yahoo News Redesign May Pull a Technorati ? Why Not Twitter? (Wired News) Bloggers have uncovered URLs for a new Yahoo News layout which includes a ?Most Blogged? section. The list is presumably based off Buzz Tracker, which displays related blog posts and those that link back to an article. But wouldn't a "Twittered About" section make the site seem more cutting-edge? Site: news - Google News Palm Unveils New 'Nova' Software, 'Palm Pre' Phone - CNNMoney.com
MORE RESOURCES: Site: Yahoo! News Search Results for humor New play finds humor in horror (Brigham Young NewsNet) 'Bread of Affliction,' a new production by the BYU Experimental Theatre Company, which will run Sept. 12 and 13, demonstrates how the Jewish people have survived many things largely through the power of humor. 'Whole lotta kid' kept humor despite cancer (Miami Herald) From the minute he was born, on Nov. 22, 1995, at 8.2 pounds, Bailey Blu Kayes was ``a whole lotta kid.'' He was, said his mother, Nicole Bailey, ``all energy -- running full speed, nonstop.'' TenantReports.com Injects a Sense of Humor into the Housing Market Amidst Credit Crisis (PRWeb) The mortgage meltdown makes tenant screening more important than ever for independent real estate investors. Real estate services site, www.TenantReports.com , aims to educate landlords on effectively screening potential tenants, while bringing a smile to those wrought with anxiety or fear of foreclosure at the thought of taking on tenants who can't pay the rent. (PRWeb Sep 11, 2008) Read ... Try humor to discourage kids' drama (The Charlotte Observer) Q. Our 16-year-old daughter constantly tells her younger siblings what to do and how to do it, and that the way they do things isn't good enough. It creates daily friction. What can we do to make it stop? A sense of humor would help. Fifty-plus years ago parents took child-raising seriously, but they took children, for the most part, with the proverbial grain of salt. Today's parents take ... Glossy thriller "Fringe" has heart, humor (Reuters via Yahoo! News) Strange things are happening, which is what you'd expect in a new series from J.J. Abrams. York County calendar of events (York County Coast Star) Talk: "The Art of Maine Humor" by Tim Sample at the Ogunquit Museum of American Art, at 6:30 p.m. 646-5511 / www.ogunquitplayhouse.org. Golden anniversary for Davidsons (Georgetown Record) What keeps a marriage strong and healthy for 50 years? The grown children of Georgetown residents Bob and Betty Davidson think it is their love of strong family values plus a shared sense of humor and acceptance of each other. ?Spiderwick Chronicles? comes to Fenton library (Tri-County Times) Fenton ? What do you get when you cross ice cream with a VCR? The answer? A ?time-out.? ?Hob the troll? from the Renaissance Festival, with his own special humor, music and stories, was the highlight of a ?Spiderwick Chronicles? event at Jack R. Winegarden Library in Fenton. Varner: College education puts wage earners ahead of curve (The Pantagraph) A grandfather in the area sent an e-mail commenting on a recent article and also remembered my youthful enthusiasm, humor and respect for students. He couldn?t however quite remember when he was in my class. A quick check in the grade book showed it was fall 1975. I was brand new at Illinois State University. God has a sense of humor (The South Alabamian) Psalm 59 :7-8 (NLT) "Listen to the filth that comes from their mouths; their words cut like swords. 'After all, who can hear us?' they sneer. But LORD, you laugh at them. You scoff at all the hostile nations." Jesus faced the problem of pride with many of his closest disciples. Site: humor - Google News 'Darwin Awards': accidental humor - Baltimore Sun
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